So much has happened in the last year or so while I was not writing.
Including, but not limited to:
- I have been having more than a casual flirtation with Veganism (but I admit to cheating on Vegan with her beautiful friend Vegetarian);
- I have made several job changes in quick succession, all of them positive and exciting – and scary;
- I am attempting to get a small business off the ground;
- I have attempted to learn how to juggle divorced parenting from the point of view of being a daughter with two fathers – one who died, one who has not been a huge part of my life (through no fault of his own); and as a mother who is helping her daughter navigate her relationship with her own estranged father;
- I have discovered the healing properties of marijuana(!);
- and last, but not least, I became a Grandma.
The pregnancy, birth and month or so since Natalie came into my life has changed (yet again) how I view the world and the people I share it with. I have a renewed sense of optimism. Love.
I am hoping this list starts a conversation and leads me to the right place to start sharing one or two of these stories.
In the meantime, I am checking back in with all of YOU! I have been spending an hour or so each evening crying, laughing, and engrossed in your adventures.
Blogworld, you’ve been missed~
I am the woman who smiles nicely as I excitedly walk away, task in hand to please you. Whatever “You”, You are, I aim to please. Mother, daughter, lover, friend, employer, co-worker, stranger, friend. I aim to be liked. I want to please.
If you are happy, I am happy.
Or so I thought.
Am I happy – or am I relieved that you are happy?
You always seem to be happy with me until I can’t do it. Until I disagree. Until I can’t do it fast enough or just plain don’t want to. Or until I express my feelings on a subject. Once it no longer looks like I was put on this earth to help or agree or fix something. Once I open my mouth or don’t appear to be bending over backwards to aim to please, I am nothing.
I don’t know if its my age or what but sometimes I have to say what is on my mind too. Sorry if that displeases you.